Building confidence to improve your whole life

To have self confidence is having the ability to believe in yourself and not listen to others who can knock your confidence often without you realizing.
People with high self confidence are eager, assertive and optimistic,
individuals ready to take on the world and conquer their goals.

On the opposite side of these confident people are those who are low in confidence and very often find they are despondent and distant who are often submissive or passive but always questioning themselves and their own ability. Building confidence is one of the key answers to successful achievements in academic qualifications, sporting achievements, having successful employment careers and having a very happy family and social life. In other words, having confidence can literally transform your life.

There are people that achieve a high sense of confidence that go on to have amazing success in all aspects of their life. Just look at some of the richest, most successful people such as actors, sports stars and business people who are oozing in confidence. Individuals with a lower sense of confidence are often dragged down by their inner demons, are less successful and fail.

It is easy to fall into the trap of low self confidence and difficult to drag yourself out of the hole you fell in. Just someone or something can trigger a catalog of events to individuals who were once very confident. The tiny voice in the back of your head that questions, insults and criticizes can simply grow louder and louder, if you allow yourself to listen.

Like in the cartoons where the character has the traditional devil on one shoulder shouting in one ear and an angel trying to shout in the other, a person with low self confidence can find that it's only the devil who is doing all the shouting destroying their confidence. Where you should be giving yourself a boost and a pat on the back by enjoying their accomplishments or congratulating themselves on a good job, people who are low in confidence find any sort of reason or fault in the middle of a triumph as though it shouldn't be deserved.

The key to building confidence and maintaining high self esteem is by having positive thinking. People that always think of themselves in a positive light are more than likely to have a much higher level of confidence than the people in the crowd trying to ruin them from being happy and successful. One simple way to keep positive and have an upbeat aura is to be around other positive people who are confident, happy and a positive outlook on any situation. Individuals who nit pick, criticize and try and put people down should be strongly avoided.

They are all around us. When you go to work or college, if you study the people around, it soon becomes apparent who are the negative people and who are the positive, happy people who you should be drawn to.

These negative, people are in their own virtual sinking ship and are more than keen to drag you down with them. Keeping yourself away from them and with confident people you will find it much easier to keep your high sense of self worth and finally banish the devil from your shoulder and the negative thoughts. If you ever find yourself in that sort of situation where you cannot avoid these negative individuals it's quite important to confront them on the situation.

It is more than often that school yard taunts or work related office gossip or even issues at home that can bury themselves deep in our minds and cause all sorts of havoc on our building confidence goal.

Instead of letting them allow yourself to be burdened by these harmful thoughts and words, just try and fight back. Do not be dragged down to their level but be quite insistent in the drama and back stabbing end with negative words.

This task is certain to be difficult and the easiest thing to do is to walk away and let yourself moon over the hurtful thoughts and words, but the right thing to do is to attempt to put a stop to the situation and end it once and for all.

If the individuals refuse to continue, cease, or even worsen their actions, then break apart from the trend and walk away. Unfortunately, this could mean the ending of long relationships, both job related and personal, but in the long run and pursuit of happiness and building confidence, will need to be done.

If you find yourself surrounded by so-called friends who are always lowering your self confidence and making you feel bad about yourself , it might be time to part ways and leave the relationship.

Remember, family, friends, and loved ones are supposed to make you feel good about yourself and have your best interest at heart. Unfortunately, this is not always the case and friends by title alone can often do more harm than most enemies.

Furthermore, personal relationships can have the same, if not worse, affect on ones self confidence level.

Very often, individuals who find themselves in abusive relationships are very upset and despondent about their current situation.

If a loved one is making you feel poorly about yourself by constant abusive language, criticism, and distrusting actions, drastic circumstances may be necessary. Make the case for a change in the relationship and make your loved one understand what his or her thoughts, words or actions do to your self confidence.

If all else fails you may need to make the ultimate sacrifice and make the painful break, but remember your loved ones are supposed to support and love you unconditionally at all times.If someone is failing to do so, they have not fulfilled their role in you life.

Building Confidence is a very large subject to cover and can't always be cured in an instant or by allowing a quick exercise. If you've read this far, then I congratulate you for reading this far as you know that to build confidence won't happen overnight, but you have a strong enough desire to build confidence.

Richard Samson
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