Ten Things In Life That You Can Control

We humans spend much of our time trying to control every
aspect of our lives. Unfortunately, too often we waste time
trying to control things that are simply beyond our control.

Having an understanding of what things you do control can
make it easier for you to gain control of your life and
everything in it.

1. What you do.

Your actions are yours alone. You choose to make them or not
make them and you are responsible for the effects of those
actions.

2. What you say.

Likewise, the words you speak (or write) are also
consciously chosen. Like actions, they have an impact on
your life and the lives of those you contact.

3. What you think.

Yes, there are some subconscious thoughts that you can't
control. But the things that you really think about, your
beliefs, your ideals, etc. are concepts you have chosen to
accept and believe in.

4. Your work.

Many people like to overlook this one, it being much easier
to say "Oh, I'm trapped in my job because I don't have a
degree, experience, etc."

Hogwash! That's simple a way of denying one's responsibility
in having chosen the job in the first place. It's your job
and you chose it. If you stay (or go), that's a choice as
well.

5. The people you associate with.

There's a famous t-shirt that states: "It's hard to soar
like an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys." Colloquial
is very often correct! Your friends can either lift you up
or bring you down. You make the decision which type of
friends you wish to have.

6. Your basic physical health.

Much about our health is a factor of genetics, environment,
and exposure. Much more of our health is simply a matter of
the decisions we make about our health, such as: diet,
exercise, drugs, sleep, routine physicals, check-ups, etc.

7. The environment you live in.

Your house, the condition of your home, the town you live
in, the amenities available to you are all things you can
control, although some to a lesser degree (i.e., you decide
to tolerate them or move someplace else).

8. Your fiscal situation.

Having or not having enough money is a factor of what you
make versus what you spend.

9. Your time.

You choose how to "spend" your time and how much of your
time to give to various activities. You'll never get more
time than the 24 hours you're given each day.

10. Your legacy.

All your actions, words and knowledge that you share while
you are living become the gift that you leave when you are
gone.

Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!
Jim Allen is a professional life & business coach. For more ideas, subscribe to his free bi-weekly ezine, THE BIG IDEA, by sending a blank email to: SubscribeGA@CoachJim.com

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Attain The Ultimate Sense Of Confidence!

Attitude Is A Really ImportantThing

Regardless of your age, your place in life, your occupation, or the ways you choose to spend time, I can guarantee that your attitude is one of the most significant things that determines your happiness and contentment in life.

Attitude is so powerful because it is one of the few things that every single person has the ability to be in control of regardless of any other factors in life. When life is going well and we have no complaints we can choose what kind of attitude to face each day with. Fortunately, when our lives seem like they couldn't get any worse we can also choose what kind of attitude we will have each day.

Can you think about a time in your life when your attitude made all the difference? Or, maybe think of an example from the life of someone you know. Can you think of a situation when all things looked grim and yet you or someone else's attitude made that situation better just by being positive?

You may be wondering why it is important to keep a good attitude regardless of other factors in your life. Good question. One thing I've learned about life is that it will not always go my way. It is highly unlikely that every single day for the rest of my life will be filled with joy, friendships, and peace. It is possible, but unlikely. It is much more likely that life will throw me things I wasn't expecting. Tragedies, sicknesses, and relationship trials will come my way and it will be my attitude that determines how those events affect me.

Keeping a good attitude in life allows us to remember that even in tough times we have much to be thankful for. Choose to let your attitude reflect this perspective rather than reflecting the fact that you are not getting exactly what you want at a moment in time. Let your attitude reflect all of the ways that your life has been blessed and all of the good things that have happened to you.

We have all heard it said that "attitude is a little thing that can make a big difference." I agree with whoever said those words wholeheartedly, but I'll even take it a step further and simply say that attitude is a big thing. Attitude is perhaps one of the biggest factors that determines the path and results we see in life. When we can look at the worst situations with hope and a right perspective, nothing will be too difficult to bear.



Have a confident and positive day,

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
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An Effective Trick To Help You Not Take Things Personally

I think it would be fair to say that we all have a tendency to take things personally. It's just that some of us have a greater tendency than others to do so. And, when it happens, some of us are better able to deal with it within ourselves than others.

Taking things personally is never healthy in any relationship: employer-employee, friend-friend, husband-wife, partner-partner, parent-child, . . . for a number of reasons. One main such reason is that, if you do take things personally, then your feelings will continually be at the mercy of others - whether they attacked you personally or not. That is never healthy in a relationship, and it is no way to live!

If you are someone who tends to take things people say or do personally, then I want to share with you a little trick I have found that really helps. It involves understanding why people sometimes do what they do and seeing that often what they do has nothing to do with us and that, therefore, there is no need to take it personally. I will share this trick through 2 relationship principles.

Relationship Principle 1: People sometimes are selfish. This principle may sound cynical but bear with me.

I think that it is an undeniable fact that we all have selfish tendencies. However, some of us are more selfish than others. And some of us can become selfish given the right circumstances.

By understanding and accepting that people sometimes are selfish, then we understand that sometimes people:

- will think only in terms of what is best for them,
- will see things only from their own point of view,
- will want to be right about everything,
- will want to have things their way all the time,
- will not think about how what they do affects others,
- and so on . . .

Consequently, sometimes people will do what they do simply because they are motivated by selfishness! And if they are motivated by selfishness, then there is no reason why we should take personally things they do and say as their actions had nothing to do with us. In fact, you could say that their actions has shown you just how selfish they are.

For example, if someone cuts you when you are driving, don't take it personally. Just tell yourself, "this person has just shown me how selfish s/he is by cutting me off . . . it is nothing personal!"

Relationship Principle 2: People always have a reason for doing what they do. This principle is one that I learned about people some time ago.

This principle does not mean that people are always right about what they do. Nor does it mean that they should always be excused for their action. It also does not mean that they themselves always know why they did what they did. But there is nevertheless always a reason!

Here are some reasons that I can think of that would cause people to do what they sometimes do (perhaps you can think of others):

- past unmet needs,
- current needs,
- current wants,
- past unresolved issues or conflicts,
- past hurts,
- current fears,
- current hang ups,
- ulterior motives or hidden agenda,
- current insecurities,
- past decisions,
- ego issues,
- personality disorders such as: narcissistic tendencies, ADD, ADHD, lack of empathy, . . .
- and so on . . .

Consequently, sometimes people will do what they do simply because they are motivated by who they are and the "baggage" they carry! And if they are motivated by such things, then there is no reason why we should take personally things they do and say. In fact, you could say that their actions has shown you that they behave as they do because they "have issues". Again, nothing to do with us and therefore nothing personal!

For example, I know a 12-year old boy who once told his step-mother "I love you" only to be given the reply "Yeah, well you have a funny way of showing it!" Needless to say the boy was deeply hurt by the reply (and understandably so). The way to help that boy is to help him understand that, even though the step-mother's comment sounded like a personal attack on him, the reply really reveals who the step-mother is as a person and that it was nothing personal.

In conclusion, the trick to not taking personally things people say and do is to understand and accept that sometimes people are selfish and/or they "have issues", and that their behavior often has nothing to do with us. You can even turn things around and say that their behavior betrays who they really are. This will help you shift the focus from you (which is partly why you take things personally) and place it on them (which will help you not take things personally).

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
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7 Habits Of Spectacularly Unsuccessful People

WARNING! If you want to have a fantastic life, never engage yourself in these 7 deadly habits that incompetent people do.

NUMBER 1 - They Think, Say, & Do Negative Things.

Yes. They see problems in EVERY opportunity.

They complain that the sun is too hot. They cursed the rain for ruining their plans for the day. They blame the wind for ruining their hair.

They think that everyone is against them. They see the problems but never the solutions.

Every little bit of difficulty is exaggerated to the point of tragedy. They regard failures as catastrophes.

They become discouraged easily instead of learning from their mistakes.

They never seem to move forward because they're always afraid to come out of their comfort zones.

NUMBER 2 - They Act Before They Think.

They move based on instinct or impulse. If they see something they like, they buy at once without any second thought.

Then they see something better. They regret & curse for not able to take advantage of the bargain.

Then they spend & spend again until nothing's left. They don't think about the future. What they're after is the pleasure they will experience at present.

They don't think about the consequences. Those who engage in unsafe sex, criminality, and the like are included in this group.

NUMBER 3 - They Talk Much More Than They Listen

They want to be the star of the show. So they always engage in talks that would make them heroes, even to the point of lying.

Oftentimes they are not aware that what they're saying is not sensible anymore.

When other people advise them, they close their ears because they're too proud to admit their mistakes.

In their mind they're always correct. They reject suggestions because that will make them feel inferior.

NUMBER 4 - They Give Up Easily

Successful people treat failures as stepping stones to success.

Incompetent ones call it quits upon recognizing the first signs of failure.

At first, they may be excited to start an endeavor. But then they lose interest fairly quickly, especially when they encounter errors.

Then they go & search for a new one. Same story & same results. Incompetent people don't have the persistence to go on and fulfill their dreams.

NUMBER 5 - They Try to Bring Others Down To Their Level

Incompetent people envy other successful individuals. Instead of working hard to be like them, these incompetent ones spread rumors and try every dirty trick to bring them down.

They could have asked these successful ones nicely. But no, they're too proud. They don't want to ask advise. Moreover, they're too negative to accomplish anything.

NUMBER 6 - They Waste Their Time

They don't know what to do next. They may just be contented on eating, getting drunk, watching TV, or worse, staring at the blank wall with no thoughts whatsoever to improve their lives.

It's perfectly fine to enjoy once in a while. But time should be managed efficiently in order to succeed. There should be a proper balance between work & pleasure.

NUMBER 7 - They Take the Easy Way Out

If there are two roads to choose from, incompetent people would choose the wider road with less rewards than the narrower road with much better rewards at the end.

They don't want any suffering or hardship. They want a good life.

What these people don't know is that what you reap is what you sow. Efforts & action will not go unnoticed.

If only they would be willing to sacrifice a little, they would be much better off.

Successful people made it through trials & error. They never give up. They are willing to do everything necessary to achieve what they aspire for in life.


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Secrets of a Positive Attitude

Are you constantly bombarded by thoughts of negativity? Plagued by feelings of insecurity? Do you see everything in a negative manner? The reason for this lies deep within your heart. You are what you mentally and spiritually eat.

If a person drinks alcohol on a daily basis, odds are their body will be affected in some way. They may have liver issues, develop cancer or incur some other type of health problem directly related to the amount of alcohol they have consumed. In the same way, a person who constantly feeds themselves negative thoughts will simply turn into a negative person.

This is the time to go on a diet. A diet of positive attitude food. You have to literally stop feeding your mind negative things. Ask yourself is this thought negative or positive or negative? What do negative thoughts look like? Well, they start with can't rather than can, no as opposed to yes, will and not won't. The Bible which is the greatest self help book ever written, speaks about taking every thought captive. The problem in our society has become that our thoughts have taken us captive. We have begun to let our thoughts control us.

A great way to know what we are negative about is to ask those people who are closest to us. You can ask your spouse or another person in your life who really knows you how they would rate your attitude on a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being super positive and 1 super negative. Ask this person to be totally honest with you. You will benefit from their honesty even if it causes you pain.

Ask this person what it is that you specifically say that they perceive as negative. Write down what they say and look at the actual words. Now is the time to be honest with yourself. Those words are a reflection of what is inside you. They are who you are. The great thing is that you can change. It is as simple as making a choice to do so. You must decide to replace the thoughts of negativity with thoughts of positivity. Decide what words you will change the negative words on your paper to. Once you have done this, make an effort to insert these new positive thoughts in your mind. You will begin to notice a positive change taking place in your life. Your family, friends and co-workers will all notice it as well. They may not know what is different about you. But they will know that you are not the same person that you were.

The items which are causing negativity in your life could very well be the news, movies, constantly replaying tragedy in your mind and the list could go on. These things should be eliminated if you want your new mental health regimen to be a success. The news is very negative and does not help someone who is trying to rid their mind of such thoughts. When you are feeding yourself thoughts of death from a war or gunshot or car accident visually the outcome will be negative. I do believe there is a time to grieve over the death of a loved one. However, if a person constantly replays this negative event in their minds it can lead to depression. The person who has passed away is not coming back and we must close that chapter in our lives and move on to the next chapter. This is a difficult task which can only be done by making a decision to proceed with our own life, no matter how hard this may be.

You can do it. You can and will have a positive attitude, if you simply take the steps outlined above. You do not have to be what you were in the past. You can be different in the future. The choice is yours. I know you will make a positive one.

Much continued positive attitude success.

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

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The Thieves of Personal Development

Nothing is worse than having a dream for yourself and entities getting in the way to keep you from it. The sad truth is those barriers to your dreams are usually self-created. Personal development is hindered by four main thieves operating on a daily basis within your life.

- Attitude
- Motivation
- Habits
- Time

Everything you do is a choice. With you choices is always an outcome. On another level, you could call it taking a personal responsibility for yourself. If your life isn’t flowing in the direction you wish, then perhaps it is time to dissect these four areas in a self-evaluation.

Attitude: Accomplishing great things in your life is impossible if your thoughts and words are contrary to it. When you wake in the morning are you happy to have the new day? Has your mind closed down to the potential each day brings? Doing an attitude self-check is essential to personal growth. Without maintenance on our attitude daily, it is near impossible to embrace opportunities which bring dreams closer to reality. If you take a good look around you, you will see people stuck on auto pilot, caught up in stoic repetition. An indifferent attitude is almost worse than a bad attitude. As you grow older, it becomes even more necessary to feed your mind, wash your belief systems and do daily maintenance checks on your attitude. Being unaware of poor thoughts is a poor excuse for not being able to reach out for your dreams. Attitude accountability is reaching out for resources and self-help tools purposely. By not doing so, this thief surely will steal your joy of self-discovery.

Motivation: Simply put, motivation is having an “iron will”. If you do not mean to do something, you won’t. You might dance around thoughts of doing something while melting away on your couch, but until you actually initiate your will through actions, it is only fluff. The hard truth is you are the biggest poser in your own life if you have no motivation to accomplish a wanted dream or goal. No one said finding motivation would be easy either. Every single person has or has had difficulties with motivation. It remains a number one challenge in personal development. There will always be the little voice inside you telling you to get motivated later. Until you make up your mind to exercise your will now, motivation will elude you, keeping it thief number two in personal growth.

Habits: Habits keep you in your comfort zone. Habits provide security. They feel safe, whether they are good habits or bad ones. They can also keep you from moving on into new and uncharted areas of growth. Which habits do you possess? Are they a part of your problem or part of your solution? Sometimes poor habits become so ingrained into who you are, you don’t even notice how they rob your dreams. Developing new habits that are in sync with your goals, is the key to personal development. You must emit behavior which supports the results you want. The reason they are called habits is because you do them over and over and over. To keep this thief robbing your life, you must find ways to eliminate unproductive habits.

Time: The word speaks for itself. It is a universal container for holding all of our life meaning. Finding time, not enough time, out of time…and to each and every human is a lifetime. This is your food for thought: at the end of your life, how will you have defined your journey in regards to time? Did you make time work for you or did you do time? Each moment belongs solely to you, to your choices and to your dreams. Respect the value of each moment life gives you for all things meaningful.

Have a confident and positive day,

JD
Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

Are You Doing What You Love?

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. --Albert Schweitzer (1875 - 1965)

We are busier than we have ever been, working long hours and feeling under more and more pressure. How do you spend your days? For many people work and pleasure are seen as separate, with work being a chore that has to be done to pay the bills. It doesn’t always have to be like that. Although we don’t have to love everything we do, we do need to gain some enjoyment from most of what we do. Take a moment to see if it is time to start afresh and do something you love, something that adds the pleasure factor back into your working life?

Think about what matters to you and why you do the things you do. For each person that means something different. What aspects of a job are important to you? List them. Think about your dream job. Does it motivate and inspire you? If not, think again. It has to mean something to you; otherwise you will not be prepared to put in the effort to achieve what you want. Ask: ‘What am I prepared to give up to make this happen?’ ‘What would I love to try?’ ‘What options do I have?’ ‘What are my talents, skills and qualities?’ ‘How can I utilize them in my ideal job?’ How can you take an idea and turn it into reality? Get creative and think through how you could make money doing what you enjoy.

Starting anew requires courage, confidence and commitment. Hold on to your sense of purpose. Believe in yourself. Ignore the critics, for there are bound to be some, and face your fears (there will many of those too!). Ask for help from those people who can assist you and get supporters to keep you motivated. Research things that interest you and, if necessary, go back to basics and learn new skills. Develop a clear vision of where you’d like to be in 10 years’ time – and why. Write it down. Be specific. This will provide you with something to focus on. Think creatively. This may not happen all of a sudden, but if you work at it gradually, day by day, it can happen.

And if starting something new is not for you, how can you love the job you already have? You can’t always control your situation, but you can always choose how you react to it. Your attitude colors how you face every day and has an influence on the people around you. Choose to be positive. Are there areas of your job that you can improve on? Who can you discuss this with? Is a change to a new role in the same company an option? Examine the possibilities. Your job does not define you, but how you do it does.

And why bother? Doing what you love gives you a good reason to get up every morning. Your life will be challenging, certainly, exciting, definitely. Doing things you enjoy which give you personal fulfillment and satisfaction has been shown to contribute to good health and longevity. Don’t wait for perfect circumstances to start. Begin now!

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
The Little Manual of Happiness – 7 Simple Steps to a Joyful Life

Positive Thinking

Our self-esteem and confidence will decrease if we think about negative things most of the time. Don't let negative thoughts take over your life. Positive thinking and self-talk will help to change your life for the better and you will feel better about yourselves and others around you.

Stay positive by thinking and do whatever makes you feel good about yourself. Don't pay attention to what others think just listen to your conscious and subconscious to becoming the person you want to be.

Set goals and write them down, since it will help you in many ways. Make sure these goals are big and challenging. To succeed and reach our goals we have to be positive so that we can succeed.

Once you've set your goals in life, take control and make the challenge to get to the end. Figure out in your mind with positive thinking and self-talk who and what you need to do to succeed in order to reach your goal. Our inner feeling needs to think positive whether it is consciously or subconsciously. Let you mind think and do the talking.

Learn to be more enthusiastic and dream big to be successful. Make a commitment to be positive with yourself in order to be in control. Listen to your positive thinking and self-talking skills to make your dreams come true.

Learn to relax and learn new skills for self-improvement by thinking positive. Let your subconscious talk you through the ideas on how to improve yourself and take control to get where you want to go at the end of the rainbow. You can learn and will learn by being a positive thinker and let your self-talk tell you how to do it.

Be creative and accept challenges by have you positive thinking and self-talk help you through them. You'll soon be in control with your new positive thinking and listening to your thoughts. You can change your negative thoughts to being positive thinking and letting your self-talk tell you what needs to be done.

Meeting new people and talking with them will help your conscious and subconscious mind to think positive thoughts. Asking questions and telling people what you have done or feel will give you the confidence that you need to build up your self-esteem and give the mind positive thinking in self-talking.

Let you inner feeling learn new skills and techniques to help change you into the person you want to be by positive thinking. Your inner thoughts will change as you keep building up your self-esteem changing from negative to positive thoughts.

With positive think and self-talk, subconsciously you'll see that your attitude and confidence is changing each day. Always ask questions, write down your goals and thoughts, always being positive will lead you to success.

You'll notice your health will improve as you build up your self-esteem. Become a healthier person when you change your attitude by eliminating stress that builds up within our selves.

Stress will and can cause many health problems for all of us. If we have a lot of stress from negative things going on it will learn to control our lives. Once stress takes over our inner self it can lead to depression and sometimes is deadly. Don't let your negative thoughts take over to depression. Stay happy with positive thinking and self-talk.

By reassuring yourself by noting your attractiveness, it will build your confidence. Insist on making changes. When you feel negative, start self-talk sessions to regain your confidence. Each step you take is one-stepping closer to a better you.

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!
Thank you to our guest author: Oliver Dodd
Oliver Dodd is the publisher of many Self Talk and Positive Thinking articles and courses, trying to improve peoples lives by using the power of self talk to create abundance and better living

7 Step Process to Positive Thinking

I'm sure you have a bright idea hidden somewhere in the back of your mind that you just can't wait to test out. Of course you're not the only one with the bright idea. So what motivates you to churn those creative, or even inspiring juices to its utmost flavor?

It's always best to set up a personal goal where you can accomplish the most in record time, maybe like mowing the lawn in an hour before the big game on TV. A correct and positive attitude in whatever you do will make things easier, and even enjoyable.

Here are some tips to make it through the week even if you're just sitting in your favorite couch. An idea takes time to form in your head and is always at work while you are busy sitting.

Having a bit of positive thinking can help you realize things that are never thought possible. Thinking big is indeed the American Way and that what made our country prosperous.

1. Take passionate action towards living your life by design. Talk is cheap. Action = deposits in the bank of a passionately authentic future. Without it, passion is void.

This is a perfect example where dreams are made of where you start by tinkering with your mind, then with your hands. And if the idea weakens, you can always go back to it later until you finish it.

2. Commit to yourself as well as those you love to create powerfully a life you can love. Instead of reacting, commit to creating from your heart and soul, out of love rather than fear. The American Dream will always be there, but a dream will still be a dream without motion. Be amazed as the transformation begins.

3. Recognize and embrace the thought that each moment is perfect regardless of its outcome. Every time you hit on something that may appear too extreme, why not give it a shot and see if it will work. You will be surprised to see of there are other ways to get the task done in time. If you are not pleased with the outcome, decide to use that moment to learn from and make the appropriate shift.

4. Dwell completely in a place of gratitude. Learn to utilize what you have in your hands and make use of it in the most constructive way. Slipping into neediness will become less of a habit when you repeatedly shift towards gratitude, away from poverty consciousness.

5. Use a Passion Formula of Recognize/Reevaluate/Restore in place of the Shoulda/Woulda/Coulda whirlwind. The former is based in increased knowledge and abundance while the latter focuses on scarcity and lack. As you face people or tasks that may seem harder than scaling the summit of the Himalayas, allow yourself to realize that the task is just as important as giving out orders to your subordinates. You would rather be richly passionate!

6. Keep humor at the forefront of thought, laughing at and with yourself when possible. You may find yourself quite entertaining when you loosen up! I am yet to see a comedian ever go hungry even though his jokes are as 'old as great-grandma'. Life has so much to offer to allow you to mope around in self pity. Humor is very attractive, very passionate: life-giving.

7. Believe that you are the architect of your destiny. No one can take your passionate future from you except for you! Create your life authentically. As long as there's still breath in your body, there is no end to how much you can accomplish in a lifetime. The concept of thinking big is all about enjoying your work, which would lead to celebrate a discovery that is born within your hands. Watch everything flow into place with perfect, passionate precision.

It's interesting how people get wallowed up by something trivial as learning to use a computer, when nowadays that top computer companies are manufacturing software that even the kids can do it. I don't mean to be condescending, but that's the idea of not having any positive thinking in your life-you'll just end up as a dim bulb in a dark corner. So instead of subjecting yourself to what you will be doomed for, make your path by taking the first step with a positive attitude.

Have a confident and positive day,

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

What type of attitude do you have?

People with a positive mental attitude are more successful, have more friends and are prone to get promoted faster than people with negative
attitudes. People with positive attitudes are generally more healthful and recover quicker from illness.

No one likes to be around negative people. Negative attitudes push people away from you and makes you less enjoyable to be around. Seldom will a negative attitude get you anywhere in life.

Negative attitudes breed negativity and contempt for the negative person.

Those with a positive attitude spread joy and happiness to those around them.

Try smiling more often and watch those around you begin to smile more also.
The attitude you give is the attitude you receive.

Positive attitudes don't always make your problems go away but it sure makes
them easier to deal with.


Give yourself this quick attitude check up:

1. Would people say you are a joy to be around?

2. Do you often speak more about the negative things in your life than you do the positive aspects?

3. Do people seem to avoid you? Can you count the number of friends you have on one hand?

4.Do you ever check the phone to see if it is working because no one calls you anymore?

It may be time to adjust that attitude of yours! It may take time to get used to turning
that frown upside down and getting rid of the scowl on your face but you and everyone around
you will benefit from it.

Remember, joyful, happy people with a positive mental attitude are healthier, heal quicker and live longer than those with negative attitudes.

Have a confident and positive day,

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

Stop cussing out the red lights!

Stop cussing out the red lights and start celebrating the green lights!

In other words stop focusing on the negatives and
focus on the positives in your life. When you dwell on the negative aspects of life
you can become depressed and discouraged.

Focus on the good and soon you will develop a positive mental attitude.
You have a choice on how you view life. Being positive can improve the
quality of your life and also lower stress levels.


So how can you keep a positive attitude?

1. Don't join in on others negativity.

2. Maintain a healthy lifestyle.

3. Get the proper rest you need.

4. Leave your work at the office.

5. Do a good deed for someone.

6. Read or learn something new everday.

7. Take up a new hobby.

8, Stop and smell the roses.

9. Beleive in yourself.

10. Work on you self confidence.

11. In every challenge, look for the positive lesson.

12. What you think you become - think of all the positive things in your life.

13. Surround yourself with true happy friends.

14. Be thanful for what you have.

15. Don't gossip.

16. Get up on the right side of the bed - choose your positive attitude as soon as you get up.

17. Enjoy a good laugh throughout the day.

18. Do whatever it takes - find a solution to the problem.

19. Use affirmations such as - "I feel healthy" "I feel happy" "I love my life"

20. Be the cause of your positive mental attitude.

"Don't spend your precious time asking "Why isn't the world a better place?" It will only be time wasted. The question to ask is "How can I make it better?" To that there is an answer. "
~ Leo Buscaglia

This list could go on and on and I would love to see it grow. Tell me how you keep a
Positive Mental Attitude.

Have a Confident and Positive Day!

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

Smiles are free :)

Today as I was waiting to get my haircut I noticed a young girl of 8 or 9 who was with her father who was also waiting to get his hair cut wearing a t-shirt that said Smiles Are Free. This of course made me smile and I began to take notice of the others around me and they were all smiling.

As I was sitting there waiting I thought how great it would be if smiling was a disease and if everyone that came in contact with a smile contracted it and spread it to many others and what a great world we would live in.

Then it struck me, smiles are a contagious disease! And it only takes 14 muscles to smile while it takes 72 muscles to frown.

A smile costs nothing but gives much. It enriches those who receive without making poorer those who give. It takes but a moment, but the memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None is so rich or mighty that he cannot get along without it and none is so poor that he cannot be made rich by it. Yet a smile cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away. Some people are too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give. ~Author Unknown


Wow I hope this is one disease they never cure!

Give someone a smile today and watch it spread.

Have a confident and positive day.

JD

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

Esther and the secret of a long happy life?

I had the pleasure of meeting "Esther" (not her real name) yesterday.

She was dining at the table next to mine with three other people. You could tell that the four of them had not seen each other in awhile and was enjoying some great conversations and tales of their youth.

Esther's laugh would make me bring my head up and glance over at her. Esther's laugh was infectious and often sounded like a child's giggle. Every time she laughed, her eyes would light up with a brilliant glow and her smile was wide and friendly.

As I sat there enjoying my dinner I realized that my smile was a constant thing on my face and that my eyes kept wandering over to Esther's smiling face and beautiful eyes. It was becoming difficult not to stare at this beautiful woman.

My meal was now complete but not wanting to leave the presence of this amazing woman I decided to order coffee and desert. Now believe me I was not eavesdropping, I could not hear the conversations, but could hear the laughter.

Not really wanting my dessert I pushed it aside and toyed with my coffee cup further delaying my departure. Soon after my second refill, I noticed the three guests with Esther stand up. My heart skipped a beat before I realized that the three of them where headed off to the restrooms.

Feeling a little like a single guy in a pick up joint, I decided to make my move. Approaching Esther with a big smile on my face I introduced myself.

"Hi my name is J.D. and I was sitting at the table next to yours. I just wanted to tell you what a great laugh you have and what a wonderful smile that just makes your eyes twinkle.

Now I really felt an idiot, this was sounding like a stupid pickup line. But Esther put me at ease and introduced herself then thanked me for my remarks.

Being the lady that she is, Esther asked me to take a seat.

"Thank you Esther" I respond as I pull my chair over to her table. "So you're not from around here are you?" I ask, making it sound like another stupid pickup line.

Esther laughed with that glorious laugh and asked "J.D. are you flirting with me?" giving me a little wink.

Blushing a little I replied with a smile on my face "Esther I'm a married man, but given different circumstances and another era, I could be."

Now Esther's guest were returning and we made introductions all around. One was her sister in law and the other two were her children. It turns out that Esther was on vacation and came out to visit the family.

After some small talk and as they were preparing to depart I finally decided to pop the question. "Esther would you answer a question for me?"

With a smile on her face she looks at me and said "You want to know how old I am?" "I am 93 years old"

Esther must have noticed my eye grow wide at her response, chuckling she continued "Oh so I am to old for you is that it?"

"No Esther you are not to old and that was not the question I was going to ask." Again I was blushing and smiling like a little school boy.

I explained to them of my interests in self improvement and how I enjoy writing articles and sharing experiences and lessons on personal growth.

"What I wanted to know was your secrets to being happy and having a smile on your face all the time and now I also want to know you secrets to a long life"

"J.D. there are no real secrets to it, but I will share my thoughts with you and give you the short version."

"Make good friends, love your family, don't fret over minor details, never go to bed mad, think good thoughts, help others, keep a smile on your face, never stop working and" as she winked at me she said "flirting with young guys is what keeps me young"

At his moment her sister in law spoke up and said "You know J.D. Esther still works 40 hours a week as a nurse and won't retire because she enjoys helping people so much."

I then asked Esther if I could give her a hug.

"J.D. I thought you would never ask" and with that she, "Esther", this tiny 93 year young woman still working full time as a nurse gave me a hug as if I was her son or long lost friend.

The love and kindness that radiated from this woman was over whelming, I stooped and planted a kiss on her cheek.

Esther, bless you and I hope to see you next year!

Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!

Making and being a great friend

Have you come across a person who is so naturally friendly that when you put him inside a room of strangers, he'll be friends with almost everyone in no time? We call such a people-person, someone unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything.

A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential!

See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person.If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can't see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start.

1. Be genuine.

Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.

2. Be the greatest listener that you can be.

To earn the love and trust of the people, listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out, listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters, and it does. Brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you.

3. Laugh out loud.

I do not mean that you force yourself to laugh for every joke cracked by someone, albeit you do not find it funny at all.This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success.

4. Don't forget yourself.

In the process of fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself, allowing everyone to push you over. Remember, love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not trample on you.

5. Do random acts of kindness.

You don't have to do a John Rockefeller and blow your savings to charity. Little acts of kindness matters the most, and this can be as simple as giving someone a surprise you-take-care card or helping an elderly cross the street. When we were kindergarten students, kindness was taught to us and greatly practiced. Now is the time to revive the good deeds and this time, let them stay for good.

6. Contact your old friends.

Sad how some friendships are destined to goodbye, but thanks to technology, you can do something about it. Relive the good old days by flipping your yearbook and look for the great people whom you want to communicate with again. Adding these old friends to your roster of support peers will surely make you feel good all over.

7. Develop your personality.

Are you grouchy, grumpy and generally morose? Whoa, you can't go through life with those. Get rid of the bad traits and habits that perpetually hamper your growth. And really, who wants a grouchy friend anyway?

8. Be confident.

Be able to stride to the other corner of the room and introduce yourself to people with that winning smile of yours. Just remember: be confident, not arrogant.

9. Practice control.

When angry, don't snap at anyone. Never throw a tantrum. Stay calm and collected. Be adult enough to take control of situation and transform your anger into something more productive and passive. As soon as people think your anger goes to volcanic proportions easily, they will find it hard to come to you.

10. Keep nurturing your relationships.

Your relationship with your family, friends and significant others is too precious that you must not neglect it whatever happens. Go out and have fun with them. Do things together. Happiness will never fly from your side as long as the people who matter the most are close to you.

In the end, using people for self-empowerment means becoming a better and more lovable person. It's a win-win situation: the people know they can turn to you anytime and vice versa.

To sum things up I truly hope that each of you see me as such a friend. If you feel that I am lacking in any area, don't hesitate to give me a swift kick to wake me up so I can correct my faults.

Thank you to all my friends!

Best wishes,
JD
Discover How to Control the One Thing that Means More to Your Accomplishments and Happiness than Anything Else ... Your Attitude!